I Don't think it's going to Work!!!!!

I've been trying to get use to this breathing machine (c-pap). The Dr said I had mild to moderate sleep apnea, that I quit breathing 17.8 times in an hour and the oxygen level dropped down to 82. He said I qualified for oxygen, at home. (What??!!) I can't believe it,,,OMG! Since I got this machine, with a mile of hose that is hooked up to the end of my nose, that forces air in my nostrils. Which this doesn't bother me,,,it's the hose,,,,there's 10 foot of it, it seems!!!!!I'll give it a month,,,,,and it doesn't get easier,,,,,it's gone.....................I haven't felt well for about 4 weeks now,,,can't put my finger on it,,,,,maybe it's the sleep thing, I am just soooo tired,,,,,,,,,,

Next week is the appointment with the infectious disease specialist,,,,,,I'm anxious to see just what she says. I am already on an anti-biotic,,,,don't know for sure if this is the right kind,,,,everything I read, says anti-biotic, by IV,,,,so we'll see what she says. I want the strongest they make!

Been putting up freezer corn, and peaches,,,will taste mighty good this winter. Soon the green beans will be in,,oh boy oh boy, then the fun will really begin,,,washing jars, breaking beans, canning, breaking beans, can some more, breaking beans, etc. you get the picture don't you? Never ending,,,at least we'll have something to eat,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

Just How Much,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

does God think I can stand????? This is too much!!!! I told Dr Fee that I wasn't crazy about cutting on my toe (being diabetic) and he said he didn't blame me,,,,(but this is the only way we will know for sure) I asked,,,, can we just try the 6 weeks of antibiotic first???? He said if that is what I wanted to do, to buy me some time,,,that he would play with me on that. (yea!!) But to go ahead and see an infectious disease specialist, Rebecca Shadowen, and get started on the antibiotic,,So they called and she is out ????and I then asked him if maybe this had anything to do with the bone marrow and he said he didn't think so,,,and that I was looking at amputation,,,,but he would play with me on the antibiotic!!!! (WHAT!!!!???, AMPUTATE MY TOE??????? NOW,,,,,,,Just how much does God think I can stand?????? And I won't be able to stand very well with only four toes!!!!!OMG!!!!) This is becoming a nightmare!!! You all remember my mom dying of sepsis,,,from having her leg amputated,,,
A NIGHTMARE, I'm telling you,,,,needless to say,,I immediately begin taking the antibiotic,,,,,,oh please don't take my toe. I usually can see the brighter side of things,,,but I'm afraid I can't with this... It COULD get the best of me so fast,,,,,,,,,,so fast,,,,,,,,,, I try to protect myself from germs and such,,,,but how did I get this,,,,,,I just can't handle bacteria,,,,,,,,,

I also had a sleep study done on Tuesday night and guess what??? (you know it's going to be bad, don't you???? Everything I have anymore is negative,,,,,,,) the tech said that I had sleep apnea, but that the Dr would talk to me about it. And I have an appt with him next wed. To tell the truth I didn't sleep very well there, so many wires, I was hooked up to,,I kept waking up and couldn't stay asleep,,,,,I felt like I had little fevers all night long and I have noticed today, that I still have them,,,could be with the infection and all.....whew ,,,,,,,will this ever end????? Yes, it will,,,,someday,,,,and you never know when it will be,,,,,but I'm ready.......got ready when I was 16, bowed at an alter,,,when God saved me,,,,,,,,,and one day,,,,,,,,one day he'll call me home,,,,,,,

My cousin didn't show,,at the revival,,,I hope he hasn't put it off too long,,,,,,remember he is 89,,,,

Happy Fourth of July Everyone!!!

Well,,Happy Holiday and hope everyone is grilling , eating and having good family time,,,,,,,,guess I will be going back to the revival,,,,,my cousin has not showed yet,,,,,but I'm thinking Sunday,,,,yep,,Sunday would be a goooood day to get saved. Please keep us in your prayers. The church had a sweet,,,,,,sweet,,,,,,, service last night. I feel "at home" now.

The Dr talked to my cancer Dr and they want a biopsy done on the toe,,,she said something is diffidently going on with the foot,,,,she doesn't know what,,,,(like bone marrow suppression, bone infection, bone cancer, yuck!) I've been researching on the Internet and don't like what I am reading,,,,,could be alot of things,,,,,I'm not going to get upset,,,,,,,until I know something for sure,,,,,,,,,,it's not looking good. She wants me to see Kirk Fee,,,,orthopedic Dr...I already see him for my knee,,,,and get him to do the biopsy,,(she only does the procedure in Russelville,,,don't want to go there when all of my Drs are on BG) and Friday they were out for the holiday,,,,so I'll have to get it set up next week. whew,,,,sometimes this is all so overwhelming,,,Jonathan can't understand why I have so much stuff,,,,,again,,,,a suppressed immune system,,,,,,,they don't tell you this good stuff of what can happen to you,,,,and they want to do even more chemo,,,,,,,,,UGH!!!! My CLL will probably not kill me,,,,,,it will be something about the immune system,,,,you wait and see. But I still get around good and work quite a bit,,,,,,of course alot of the time I am in bed the next day,,,,but if you see me out fishing or working in the yard,,,,it's a GOOD DAY!!! I feel like doing something,,,,,this revival is rough,,,,,soooo tired,,,,but I hope the victory comes in the end,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,and Victory is sooooo sweeeet!!!

Some good news,,,,,

Well, Good News!!! The blood work looks bad, but not critical,,,that's good news in my book. The lymph count dropped back down to a 6.4, that's still high but not critical,,,good news. I go back that last of the month for blood work and August to see the Dr. But,,,,,,,,I had the MRI done on the toe,,,and guess what,,,,,,,,,,bone deterioration,,,,,what???? What caused that????,,,,,Drs not sure,,,she said a possible bone infection,,,,,what???? How did I get that??? Could be because of the Leukemia,,,she's not sure,,,wants to do a biopsy,,,,(another side effect of the chemo-suppressed immune system,,,,my body just can't handle bacteria)----IN MY TOE??? I've never heard such stuff,,,,,,,,,(they never explained what a suppressed immune system was,,,,,or what it could effect, I just thought I had to be careful around sick people,,,,,I was wrong!) So I asked her to talk to my cancer dr and see what he thinks I ought to do,,,,,,she wants a biopsy and if it is an infection,,,,a pic line put in and daily doses of antibiotic for 6 weeks (oboy) I thought maybe something was going on with the bone marrow,,,that's why I wanted her to consult the cancer dr,,,,so I am waiting to hear from her,,,,,,,always something,,,the platelets were 67,,,,,I'm holding my own there.......then there's the lung dr,,,he wants a sleep study done to see if I have sleep apnea,,,,,I had the appt for tonight,,,but had to cancel,,,I went to revival instead,,,I rescheduled for next tuesday nite.

Please remember this revival,,,It is First Hardin Church and some of my kind are supposed to attend,,,Bro Freddie Vertrees and Steve Doyle are helping.......my cousin Chester Brooks, we are hoping will attend,,,,,,Oh and I hope he gets saved,,,,he is 89,,,,yes I said,,,89. Please remember him,,,,I would love to see him make it,,,,,,,,I'm trying to attend,,,,but stay awfully tired,,,,but wouldn't it be worth it, if he got saved,?????,,,he's 89,,,,gosh,,,he needs to get saved,,,,,,,89!

A New Roof,,,,,,,

Well,,,,it's been a week for sure,,,,,,they have started on the roof,
(a new metal one, cocoa brown) they have both ends and tomorrow they will start on the middle,,,,also they will do the lean to on the barn, and then hopefully the closet over the stairs and banister. So much to do.

The Annual Day for homemakers was thursday and turned out really well. Our club was in charge of entertainment this year. We made up a trio of Judy Guy, tenor, Natalie Vincent (dil) on alto and me, lead. Sue Bell, Judy's mom played the piano for us. We sang a few funny songs, and then a few church songs. We had a pretty good harmony going. It was lots of fun, and I hope we have the chance to sing again some day. Food was awesome and seemingly fun was had my all. We got first place on our name tags.

As soon as I get the roof taken care of I am going to try and get the basement leak fixed,, I'll just have to see if there is any money left!

This week I go back to the Dr. The lymph count has gone up to an 8.4, so if he wanted to do chemo at 7.4,,,,guess what????? But that is on Friday, I'll just have to wait and see. The toe Dr said she wants an MRI on the middle toe,,,,what??? Yep, that's what she said,,,she said the x-ray showed deterioration from the nail,,,,,,to the bone,,,a possible bone infection. Possibly 6 weeks of antibiotics. Oboy!!! That would postpone chemo for a while, since I can't do both at the same time. Will let you all know at the end of the week.

Ain't God Good,,,,,,,,,,,

Homecoming was good,,,,,,the funeral was good,,,,,,,well, ain't God good,,,,,,,,,What a weekend it has been,,,,,,, with visiting the funeral home, church meeting on Saturday,,,,,, homecoming services and the funeral,,,,and God showed up at all of them,,,ain't God good!!!! The Sego family from Fairdale church in Louisville came and sang,,,,,,their son, Ryan preached,,,and it was soooo good!!! The food was good. Aunt Elva always put out her food next to mine on the table,,,and next to hers was Virginia's (Rich),,,and both has passed away since last year's homecoming,,,,,,how sad. Again,,,God calls and we will answer. Aunt Elva's funeral was good,,,,,a huge crowd,,,she was loved very much,,,,,please keep Uncle Howard in your prayers,,,,,I don't know how it will be for him,,,,and he is so frail. As for me,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,I am exhausted,,,and in need of much needed rest,,,,which I plan on doing after this post. The kids have just left after eating leftovers,,,,(yummy). It's going to be another busy week,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,Annual Day for homemakers is this week and a couple of Dr visits.

I feel the need to talk,,,,,,,,,

It's been a very busy week,,,so glad everything turned out well at the drs and I believe the medicine is helping,,,I'm begining to slow down some,,,,,,,,,,but on thursday I received a phone call that Ronnie's Aunt Elva has passed away,,,,,(tears, tears) I just can't believe it!!! So unexpected,,,,,she would have been 80 on July 1. I just loved her and her husband Howard who is a minister,,,Even though they were Ronnie's family,,,I felt as if they were mine,,,,and she treated me that way to,,,always sooo good to me. They lived less then a mile from me and I would go with them to the Drs when they needed to go,,,,,Howard baptized me and married me and Ronnie,,,,,they are just soo special and such good people...But God calls and we all will answer,,,,,whether we are ready or not,,,but I believe she was ready,,,such good memories,,,everyone tonight at church were remembering the precious memories they had of her,,,,Tomorrow is our church homecoming, she always put out her dinner next to mine,,,,I will miss her,,,,,,,and tomorrow is her funeral (after the homecoming) and I have been asked to sing,,,,,what an honor!!!! It's such a small thing to do for someone so special. I'm cooking for homecoming and just wanted to stop a moment and to talk about her,,,,I loved her so much,,,and in my younger days,,,her house was the gathering place for kids,,,,she had two girls (around my age,,,and were Ronnie's cousins) and we would gather there and have the best time,,,,,I mentioned that Howard was a minister,,,,he has preached all over and was pastor of Owensboro church for years,,,,,traveled all them miles,,,,,, for years. He is in failing health and has just started taking dialysis,,,,and grows weaker and weaker,,,I wonder what will happen to him. Remember us at the funeral tomorrow that the Lord will bless and that God will comfort Uncle Howard and his family,,,,oh I will miss her sooo much.