Got a hold of the Dr yesterday,,,,,,,,,,,,,

Dr Thomas Young,,,,and he has set up a "Pet" scan, to see how the nodes are doing all over,,, and then I see him the following week. He says this is common for chronic lymphocytic leukemia patients (also known as CLL),,,,,,,he is not volunteering a whole lot of info on the subject,,,,I have to find out most of my info on the internet,,,,but that is typical of Doctors,,,,"you don't ask, they don't have to tell
",,,,,,so you learn to read between the lines and do research for yourself. I do know that the scan will also tell me if it has spread to any nearby organ,,,,,(that is interesting,,,,,,I remember when Ronnie had one,,,,and in a matter of 3 hours of finding out it was esophageal cancer for sure and the pet scan showed it had already spread to 4 other places,,,,,which we had no clue,,,,amazing what they can do nowdays) So this will be a good thing. That scan will be next Tuesday. Then I will have to wait a whole week to find out the results of the scan and find out what we will be dealing with. He did mention that since they are so painful that there was some chemo we could do,,,,,,but,,,,,,,,that will just have to depend on the type of chemicals and etc......After all,,,,we have a big wedding coming up on June 26th, big day for Jonathan and Tiffany,,,,I most diffently want to have hair for this,,,,and a bridal shower to plan and a rehearsal dinner to throw together. After all, I have waited 29 years for this!!!!! So it all depends,,,,,,,

We are also working on a church cookbook for our 100th anniversary in September,,,,,we have already started working on it and hope to have it finished by May 1st and off to the printers. I feel the need to stay busy,,,,cancer is so nerve racking,,,,,,can be so over whelming at times. And I'm hoping to stay in a good frame of mind,,,so easy to get in a "why me" or self pitying mode. Not so easy to stay focused on the "BIG" prize. I will say,,,,,, I fill the need to "set my house in order" just to be ready,,,, in case of an all out major infection,,,,,,,,that creeps up (like the last few have done). My Mom died of sepsis,,,,,a life threatening infection,,,,,so I have a terrible fear about infection (it's actually a dirty word to me,,,,haha).

Thanks to all who have thought of me,,,said a prayer for me, wrote on my blog, sent a e-mail,,,,couldn't make it without you all. Big thank you to my boys who have been there to help me, they are trying hard to take up the slack that a daughter would automacially have done. And thankyou to my brother Jimmy for calling today to check on me,,,,was good to hear your voice and talk to you,,,,love you bunches. Sometimes I wonder why ,,,,,why all this?????? to endue without Ronnie,,,,,,but you know,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,(tears),,,,,God does have a plan,,,,,,,,,,,(tears),,,I don't understand it all,,,,but I trust that he does,,,,,,,,,for he has all of us in his hands anyway. But as the song says,,,,,"If I can help Somebody",,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,it would be worth it all,,,,wouldn't it!!!